Two days... one post...

Missed yesterday due to being a VERY long day and internet dying last night, so, since I'm not trying to do 365 posts, just instead telling what I do each day, here's both yesterday and today in one...

1/26/2010
Good day overall save for a almost crippling headache for a large portion of the school day. Finally went away a bit before school ended. Left after school, dropped Caleb off at home, picked up Alex's book, dropped it off at the library, picked Alex and Kyle up, dropped Kyle off, dropped Alex off at the library, picked Andrew up, dropped Andrew off, dropped Hair Salon Shop application off. Then headed over to Sweet Spirit to chat with Caitlin who was on break. Very fun time. Filled out an application there too. Ugh... starting to get discouraged. >_< Then started to head home to get dinner before remember it was Tuesday and had Drama Improv. Went to church. We all lagged tonight, but even in our slowness, we were pretty funny. Not amazing, but even if we're all dead tired come Feb 13, we'll still get some laughs. =) Then finally went home and got ready for school tomorrow.

"Play by the rules,
Use available tools.
Don't be too late,
There's no time to hate."

-Jake Kelton


1/27/2010
God, please help our country. Oh, it is in such need right now. Strong leadership, active decision makers, and doing rather than talking.
Today was again good. Again had another headache. Got it in 2nd. Probably Ms. Johnson's fault. XD Got Jafar for Aladdin, so I get to grow out a really long bead. Joy... XD Anyway, drama club was fantastic. Got to do a Simon Cowell impression as we had a panel of four "judges" for the monologues people read. They get better each week! So impressive. *sniff* So proud of all of them! =D Went to Miranda's youth group. Fun. Barely pulled off 41 pushups to top Warrens 40, but I had to rest a time or two for a few seconds and he didn't really... well, maybe once. One day, that 100 number will happen. ;) NEED to get a new profile picture of Miranda and I... hm... Also, Sundae is really pushing me playing Jesus for their Easter play, meaning I get to really grow my hair out and grow a beard. Which means I REALLY need to get my Senior pictures done. Like... Friday. XD Uuuuurgh. Well, God will provide. Provide me a spanking so I get my booty moving. >_<
=P

Rather than a poem, I want to share a piece of writing I did a while back when I was feeling down. This in no way reflects my mood tonight, just a more extreme version of a feeling I had a while back.

"Rain waxes and wanes in a slowly increasing beat as the heavens cry on the earthy clay. You lean against the window, breathe slowly coming in and out of your lungs, silent and slow. The pane of glass fogs up, clears slowly, only to fog up again with exhaled air, almost as if to copy the falling water pounding on the other side of the diamond wall. Pitter, patter, pitter, patter, pitter, patter, it goes on and on, ever repeating. Tired eyes trace the gray trees, gray year, and empty gray driveway. Head seems so full, and yet so lacking in its empty hollowness. Behind the eyes rests an inescapable pressure, building, shrinking, building shrinking. Crystal rain, opaque breathes, burning thoughts, all flowing like oceans tides. Exhausted of thought, you attempt to pour music’s sweet escape into the empty hole. One song goes by, followed by a second. A third replaces it, and still you sit, knees up, arms hugging. But no matter how much you play, the hole is still there, just as no matter how much you hug, it won’t be around the one you want to hug. So you sit. A fourth song plays, a fifth, and now you’ve lost count in the meaningless words and the tuneless music echoing off your ears. You shiver. This time you don’t react, knowing that no matter how many layers you wear, you won’t be warm. Maybe the sun might begin to thaw the frosts icy grip, but no sun peaks its head today. Moaning cotton balls of pent up hurt and fear roll on across the darkened lands face, ever dropping tears of sorrow and loneliness. Then, that song comes on. The one you will never forget. The one you danced, let it go, let your spirit fly. With that one, the one, the only one you hug like that, dance like that, love like that. The one holding the key to your lock, the hole in your heart; whose voice can bring a burst of rainbow butterflies from your chest. You close your eyes and let your mind wander to that night, the night of music, of rain, of dance. But the rain was tears of ecstasy, a joy indescribable from all other happy moments. The night was a night of bright lights, shared passion, and a moment in each others arms that cannot be forgotten. A night of a single pair of dancers, but lost in a crowd of jigsaw piece partnered couples. You know your pieces match; color, shape, tone, and texture. So different, and yet fit so perfectly together. And tonight you share in that knowledge, looking into each others eyes, lost in each others worlds. And just when you feel your soul is being stolen, the one leans in, closing the distance, eyes closed and- You blink. Across the room your little cell is buzzing. Leaping from your chair, you stumble to the edge of the couch where you left it. Grabbing your phone you rub your eyes for a second, still dazed from your nostalgia. Pitter, patter, pitter, patter, pitter, patter, the rain continues with repetitive reverie. Hope, hope, hope, is it the one? Hope. Your fingers tighten for a moment as the phone buzzes again. You close your eyes tight, mentally wish a small prayer, and then simultaneously open your hands and eyes. You look."

Hope it didn't bring too many tears. =D
Heading to bed. Night!

-Jake Kelton

School, Drama Club, Youth, and youth.

School was good. Doing a new, pretty cool picture in art. Think I did ok on the two quizzes I took today. We'll see tomorrow. So far got good grades in Math. =P Drama club was a lot of fun. Listened to a number of monologues. *sniff* They're sooo talented and good. Still need improvement, but even without much direction, they are fantastic. Can't wait till next week! Miranda's youth was fun. had a good discussion tonight. Really want to be a part of their Easter play (they want me to play Jesus! Yay!) but doubt that will happen since they are practicing after church on Sundays. 12:30 to 1:30. If I drove myself, I might be able to make it there if I left at 12. AT 12. But that means no after church chatting or socializing or meetings or anything. >_< I could also go to their church for the next two months, but I really don't like that idea. So I'm mulling it over with God and we'll see what happens. I feel he's really pushing me to do this, since I'm using my talents as an actor to glorify him, but I don't know how. He will provide though... I know it. Just like with my failurefull job hunting, He has a purpose... even if it's to get me to get out there more. Eh...

Also kissed Miranda goodnight as Chelsea was dropping her off. Love that girl. Maybe one day I'll be able to show her the inferno of joy just seeing her is. *happy sigh*

Besides all that, I just wanted to type a small blurb here about the youth of today. The youth, the people, the me's, the you's, so scared to be. Maybe this would do better in poem form...

"Thoughts, voices, circle in my head
They don't come from me while I'm in bed
The world presses in, suffers the me
Who I am, who I was, who I want to be.

But I fight, I push back, and I won't take no
I will live my own life, for God on the throne
I am me, I am I, who God made me to be
Through Him, from this world, I am free.

So many me's, so many you's, all walking these streets
Suffer in silence, in muteness, but wishing others would see
We all hurt, we all cry, but why won't you try
Once more, once again, spread your tattered wings and fly

What good does it do, accepting a crushed life?
"Dealing with it", "living with it", "getting through the night"?
Why can't you see how so much greater good can come
When you decide you've had enough, no longer will you hum

Sing, sing out loud, sing will all the air in your lungs!
Dance, dance with both feet, as laughter spills off your tongues!
The harsh world can move on, live it's own way,
But we shall fly upward, on ground we won't stay!

Don't bend to their wishes, be who you are inside!
Find your dream, hidden by masks, no limits to abide
Take it in both hands, hold it close and tight
And live that dream, through all that's in sight."

Came from a long talk with Sierra. So much like me, and yet so completely not. Going to have to steal her sometime when the rest of the world isn't looking. =) Also, got to take a lot of my poems in for Lit Mag. And art... And writing, though I don't have much of that... hmmm...

For now, night.

-Jake Kelton